Forgotten Sleep

I heard a quote the other day that I really like:

“I know that God won’t give me anything that He knows I can’t handle — I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”

Today was a day that falls directly, completely, wholly into that category. For those of you have you been reading this Blog, you know that I do public relations for a school inside a University. As part of that job, I am the managing editor for the alumni magazine. Normally, I adore putting together this magazine. It is the part of my job that I get the biggest kick out of. And, usually, I get incredible responses.

Not today. Today, I got the smack down. Today I had the integrity of my product questioned. The powers that be were most displeased with the quality of the photos and the way in which some of them were presented. Neither the quality level nor the presentation have changed from the previous magazine. What has changed is the leadership. I will not point fingers or lay blame or really get defensive. All I feel at this point is that someone has pulled the rug from underneath me.

Never before have I had someone tell me that the publication is unprofessional. It makes me sad. It makes me feel awful that somewhere down the line I let someone down. But, it also makes me confused because the person who is now questioning the quality of the magazine saw it before it went to print, save for a few replacement photographs that, frankly, were “must-uses” because there was nothing else from which to choose.

So, coming back to my quote from earlier. My life has been spent with my feet to the fire, practically. Everything that I’ve ever achieved, I’ve had to work myself silly for. At every job I’ve ever had, I’ve encountered some dilemma or obstacle that has made my stomach clench and made me reach for a beer or a glass of wine.

Clearly, I’ve survived, and I’ve come out stronger on the other side. I’ve learned to have no ego at work, to listen, to repeat back, to accommodate when I can. I’ve learned skills that help me navigate through the workplace minefield. Each of these instances has forged me into the professional I am today. In retrospect, I’m thankful for each of these experiences because I knew what red flags to look for as I work through my career.

Right now, though, I just want it to be over. I wish that people understood the complexity of putting together a magazine. Nothing is simple about it. There are many steps, and nothing will ever be perfect. And, truly, it would be nice if someone could appreciate the work that goes into it. The writing, the editing, the photography, choosing the photos, going through the design….it’s a long hard slog trying to put a magazine together.

I suppose everyone really is a critic. It would be nice, though, if sometimes they’d keep their feedback to themselves.