Forgotten Sleep

All I can say is that it’s about freakin’ time.

In all my years as an avid political observer, I’ve seen a lot of things that have frustrated me, made me angry or, flat out, disgusted me. Nothing has ticked me off more, though, that the image of the dutiful, long-suffering politician’s wife. If the saying that behind every successful man is a strong and good woman, then why do all of these ladies look and act like doormats?!

Think about it — over the past decade, what have we seen? N.J. Gov. James McGreevey resigned in 2004 after accusations that he was gay and had sexually harassed a staffer proved true. Idaho Sen. Larry Craig lost his re-election bid in 2009 after a police report that he had allegedly solicited sex in an airport bathroom came to light. N.Y. Gov. Eliot Spitzer resigned from office in 2008 amidst a blazing scandal in which he spent copious amounts of money on prostitutes — the irony in his case was rich.

The one constant in these cases has been the forlorn, dejected wife standing next to her husband at the podium while he apologized to the world and his family for his transgressions and asked for privacy as he tried to make amends. Give me a break. If he were my husband, you better believe I wouldn’t be standing there, and I certainly wouldn’t have had any supportive words to utter.

I can offer two exceptions to the rule — well one half exception and one full. Hillary Clinton may have stood by Bill Clinton when accusations and proof of all his affairs surfaced, but there are enough rumors floating around to make me feel pretty confident that Hillary scorched Bill’s ears on plenty of occasions. She’s also a powerful politician in her own right, and she’s thrown herself in an amazingly successful career. As a woman, I have to say, way to go, Hillary!

But, on to my true exception. Jenny Sanford. Today, her divorce from S.C. Gov. Mark Sanford becomes final in a Charleston family court. Last year, Sanford humiliated himself, his wife, his sons and his state when he disappeared from the country on Father’s Day weekend to visit his “soulmate” mistress in Argentina. In his public confession all he did was froth off about how wonderful this woman was and how there was an instant attraction. A public “D’oh! I’m sorry” it was not.

What was missing? Yep, you guessed it. Jenny Sanford. I love it that a woman was pissed off enough and confident enough to tell her husband, “Hell no, I’m standing with you out in front of those cameras.” Mark Sanford made this mess for himself, and she let him swing in the wind by himself when he admitted it. Rock on, sistah!

Here is a woman who is setting a positive example for young women and girls everywhere. No, I not condoning divorce as a fabulous thing. But, I am condoning and promoting images of women who are strong enough to take control of their lives and not put up with the ridiculousness that “men of power” think they are entitled to create.

We don’t need to tell our little girls that they have to suffer with the indignity caused by infidelity. We don’t need to let them think that their place is to merely succumb to the whims of their husbands or partners. Our little girls should know that it’s acceptable and expected that they stand up for themselves and demand to be treated appropriately.

So, to Jenny Sanford, I say this: You might not be the warmest of women, but my hat’s off to you. Thank you for finally doing what the majority of us have wanted political wives to do for so long. Thank you for taking charge of your life and your marriage.

Most of all, thank you for showing your four young sons that real men don’t treat women the way their father has treated you. You’ve just help school-up a new generation of men.